First Love…never let it go

I am not from Catholic church. I am from AG church (Protestant), so baby baptism is not in our dictionary. What we have is Baby Dedication. Just a simple prayer up at the alter by the pastor of the church, dedicating the baby to God and we the parent committing to God to raise them up in the fear of God. Some rich parents would throw a party after that too.

Btw, we still have not dedicated our 2nd and 3rd child to God. Maybe we will do it together and throw a small party for them in church. Maybe I will get those cute baptism invitations to invite family and friends to join the party. I can easily get some baptism invitations online. So many to choose from.

I personally like the above baptism invitation card. It reminds me of their first touch when I brought them into this world. And the color is neutral, neither pink blue, just perfect for my girl and boy. I was just wondering, anyone know what is the brush for?

Light of the world
You stepped down into darkness
Opened my eyes let me see
Beauty that made this heart adore You
Hope of a life spent with You

Here I am to worship
Here I am to bow down
Here I am to say that You’re my God
You’re altogether lovely
Altogether worthy
Altogether wonderful to me

King of all days
Oh so highly exalted
Glorious in Heaven above
Humbly You came to the earth You created
All for love’s sake became poor

I’ll never know how much it cost
To see my sin upon that cross

I grew up in an English speaking church since 1992. Due to hubby’s business, we are attending a BM church. Until today, I still am not able to worship in BM. Their worship songs are not in my head. I long to return to an English speaking church.

No Jesus but my earthly first love, my hubby!

He went to fetch our girls from kindy today, then to my mom’s to pick my boy to send him to clinic. Since he is already there, he did not pack the girls’ lunch. Told me to drive back to my mom’s to pack the girls lunch and pack for us (him, MIL and myself) from the restaurant nearby some dishes because MIL did not cook.

I only have one hour lunch break and I have to be back on time. If not my name will be in the black book. It will not make my record look good.

After I done all the above, I came home to a crying boy and a hungry girl. My boy asking to be carried and my girl wanting her milk. No hot water in the thermos. Told my girl to wait while I boil the water. While waiting for the water to boil, I transfer the food into the bowl while carrying my boy in one hand. Where is hubby? Busy helping his mom making Pulut Tekan (A Nyonya delicacy). My priority will be my children first. Their needs come first before others.

I got very upset to find out that there is no rice in the rice cooker. Only yesterday’s fried rice. He did not tell me that MIL did not cook rice, if not; I have already bought it when I buy the dishes. Maybe he didn’t now. That’s fine with me but I am angry because he tells me to buy the rice instead of him going. He got a bike; it will be faster than me driving to the shop. Instead he told me that he will cook the rice for his children. The children can wait and I go get the rice for myself.

I get more upset when I went into the room and saw that my girl slept without her milk. She sleeps when she is hungry. When children are hungry, they cannot wait. They are not adult. I don’t understand why it is so difficult for him to buy the rice. He wants convenience for himself but not for me. I only have less than an hour break.

I is angry lar!

I hit the submit button at 12noon sharp. That is Teegapee 12midnight and the blog I wrote the opp is featured as Blog of The Day. I panic. Yes! I PANIC. Those days, I will be very happy if my blog is featured as BOTD but not until recently when other posties goes snooping into your blog and make report to Teegapee about you blogging for money without investigating further. As long as they see that you have links in every post, they will go assuming that all post is paid post!

I told a few of my close blogger friends about my worries and they assured me that there is nothing for me to worry, as I did not do anything wrong as I abide to Teegapee TOS. They also told me to look at the bright side. It will generate more traffic to my blog. True enough, I see lots of new faces on my blog log, some left comments, liking my blog design and some exchanged links with me. You see, that blog has a PR 4, who wouldn’t want me to link them. Hehe.

But the highlight of the BOTD is I got a Teegapee DIRECT to write about Scrapbook. (see, I am giving the advertiser another free link here) And this is my first Teegapee Direct from the advertiser. Getting paid $15 for 50 words only but of course I wrote much more than that.

Above all, I would like to thank God for His blessing. Even though getting opp from Teegapee is so hard now, He still makes a way for me to earn some extra income from Teegapee. Jehovah Jireh, God the Provider.

People may look rich on the outside but they are actually poor with hutang keliling pinggang (loans to pay). Some may look poor but they are rich in the sense that they don’t have loans to pay. Like us. Well, we do have the home loans to pay but I am talking about credit cards and personal loans.

Like my sister, she buys expensive and branded clothing for her son and for herself too. I don’t see the necessity for a 1 year old to wear branded clothing. They grow up very fast and it will be a waste of money if you don’t have other siblings to pass it down too. Recently, her husband spends more than RM600 to fly all the way from Kuching back here just to spend 2 days with his son after one week not seeing him. He can’t wait for the school holiday which is a week after that. They are making the credit card company rich. Paying them interest every month.

All this while I thought one of my BIL is getting good income and got money kind of people lar from the way they spend. They have only one child and rents out car as they side income. Least that I know that they are owing a few brothers money and have used up their credit card limit. They just renovated their house thinking that one of their customer will pay them on time, which he did not. They borrowed some cash from one brother but that brother charges him 5% interest. His own brother charging him interest! That surprised me.

I learned something from my eldest BIL. As Christian, we should not charge interest on the money borrowed. We should help our siblings when they have problem to the extend of leaving the decision whether they want to return the money back to us or not. We are a family, we are like one body. If one part of the body hurts, it will affect the rest of the body too. This is what SIL told yesterday. And this is what eldest BIL told hubby when he loan him quite a big amount of cash for hubby to start his internet cafe business.

It saddens me to know that another BIL (backslided Christian) is charging interest and his wife keeps pushing him to ask for the money back from his brother. So I told that BIL that if he ever needs money, I have some that I can lend it to him with no interest. Income from my paid post. Since I am not using the money, might as well I help those who need it more than me. Furthermore, I will get it back. He is happy and I am happy that I can help others too.

Yeah! Thanks to this lady and this man I am able to transfer this domain from Blogger to using Wordpress for free.

Now I can add links easily and write page too. Something that Blogger does not offer.

Thank You Lord for bring such wonderful people in my life.

I learn something new yesterday. Addon Domain. It seems that I can host this blog of mine under the same hosting as my other domain with no additional cost. So happy to know that coz I prefer wordpress than blogger. Some more here I have to manually type in the html to add in the blogroll and cannot write page.

My host told me that he will do it today but no sign of him. I think he is taking care of his girlfriend who is in the hospital now due to something that I can’t tell in this blog! hehe.

Hopefully, by tomorrow this blog will be migrated to wordpress.

See you there.

I wonder whether this is the work of the devil. Causing my children and sometimes myself to fall sick on Sunday which prevents us from going to church. On many occasions, we failed to attend church because one of us fall sick.

Belle just vomited. Barnabas just fell asleep. Hope his fever won’t come back. I just recovered from runny nose. Not so sure whether it is advisable for us to attend church tomorrow as I worried other babies will get infected by whatever virus that we carry.

My body is so weak. When the air cond is on at night, I can feel the tingling feeling in my bone. That is the side effect of not following the confinement rules strictly. Bathing.

After few weeks of not getting 8 hours of sleep, my body broke down again. Yes, again! Runny nose. Bad ones. But what to do, have to earn extra income.

Sometimes I do feel the stress coz hubby is not having a consistent income from the business yet. I really hope that he would be earning pass 2k and then I can take it easy with blogging.

Anyway, will call in sick today. I need to rest.

When I am driving, so many thoughts come. Some to be written in my Sketches of Life, some to my Children’s blog and some to my Work blog. But when my finger touches the keyboard, the thought when Poof! Gone into thin air.

I wish that there is a special recorder that can record all my thoughts and I can upload in into my blogs and it will be automatically or magically converted to written words. Can someone invent it?

Some people put their security in man like self, husband, wife, parents, grandparents, children etc.

Some people put their security in money. Vocation, Insurance, Credit Cards, Banks and Bayar Post.

But do you know that all the above God can snatch it away from you with just a blink of an eye?

The Lord Giveth, The Lord Taketh. (Job 1:21)

Place your security in God. He can’t be taken away. You will be taken care off. Read Matthew 6:25-34.

Sum up for Thursday and Friday.

The Sweet
Went out for a date with hubby. The much awaited date. We ate at Johnny’s. Just to use up the discount coupon that hubby bought sometime ago. Then we went to look for aerobic VCD but couldn’t find the one that I wanted. Bought a Chinese children’s VCD for my girls. After that we went back to Dataran Pahlawan to look for drinks. Hubby got a mango yogurt, and as for me, one cup of ice lemon tea is not enough so I bought a bowl of Gingko and white fungus drink. Food for the brain.

Brought my DoReMi for a hair cut. Miracle, no crying this time.

The Sour
One of my girls stepped on the Chinese VCD that I bought and it broke into 2 pieces. They have not even watch it! Urrrgh!!!

Grab an opp for hubby but he didn’t want to do it. Went to bed!

Of all the days, I forgot to bring along my camera to the hair salon!

It is sad to hear that kind of remarks and I heard it twice in a day. From a believer and also from a non-believer!

From the believer. Her brother, own flesh and blood that brought her to Christ treated her so badly due to business partnership. Made her work like slave and did not pay her a single cent.

From the non-believer. Commented about how 2 bloggers that claim to be a Christian back stabbing one another.

Well, one thing for sure. It is not easy to carry the cross. All eyes are staring at you. So you better behave!

Summary: A day filled with mix emotions.

Woke up at 7.30am. Managed to grab 3 opp from Smortee. Praise God. Next, the part that I hate doing every morning. Waking up my girls for school. This time, Clarissa cannot wake up. Well, not point forcing her coz she slept really late that night. So I just let her stay at my mom’s while I sent Belle to school.

Quite free in the office as usual. Lady boss did not come in because she was not feeling well. Get my paper work done. Thought wanted to blog but really no mood for it. So I started this blog.

MIL did not cook. But rice is cook. So I fried rice. After filling my tummy, went to fetch my children home.

Bathe them, watch movie with them and let them play while I blog. By 10pm, wanted to shoo them to bed but each are holding a piece of mooncake. MIL really give way to whatever they want. I was a lil bit upset. Sleeping time already still let them snack. Messed up the floor some more.

Once they are asleep, I tiptoed at 11.30pm to blog. Was really sleepy but I have to earn a living. While blogging, Msau nudged me to tell me a bad news. Papabok complaint about her blog in the Teegapee Forum tilted Found a Cheater. Felt sad for her. She did tried very hard to improve her English. Anyway, damaged has been done. Just hope for the best for her.

2am - to bed.

I started journaling in books called Diary many times but it never last. I really envy those who still have and still writing in their diary since they started it.

After hearing so many people are diagnosed with cancer. Recently my SIL. I suddenly realized that if I die, there is not a single record about my life on this earth besides the one I wrote in general in my others blog. Well, I am not going to let my life pass away just like that without any record of it. I would like my children to know what their mommy went thru in her life on this earth.

From today onwards, this blog will be my diary too…straight from the heart.