Hubby love big bikes. If we have the means, he would love to own a Harley Davidson. At one time I was so tempted to buy him one! Thank God I came to my senses that the money is better saved for our children’s education and for our future mission trips.

But that never stop him from hoping that one day God will bless him with a big bike. If ever that were to become a reality I must get those cool Harley Davidson helmets for women; I want the pink one! I am already imagining myself riding with him on a Harley and enjoying the cool evening breezing as we cruise along the coastal road.

As for now, we have to be contented with his old bike and no brand helmet for me. Due to the petrol price hike, we often go dating on the bike to save petrol.

My son is already 2yo and hubby is urging me to have the 4th one. He said that 3 is too few and when it comes to financial need, we will burden them in the future since there is only 3 unlike his siblings; there are 11 of them. He can’t compare his mom and myself. The food that we eat is totally different; our lifestyles too. There is possibility that my life span is shorter than her!

Furthermore, I had breast infection after I gave birth to my son; had a minor surgery to remove the abscess and it took more than month for it to heal. I can’t imagine the pain if the breast were to be engorged again with milk. Nowadays, I often fall sick and experiencing pain on my right tummy again (I have medical history).

Even though I told him all that, he still do not want to comprehend my situation. I think he’d rather see me die earlier. That is what I fear would happened to me after I give birth to the 4th child; my health will continue to deteriorate.

Not many children to take care of me, never mind; I don’t mind living in an institution like Houston assisted living home when I grow old. I want to grow old, not die young.