Family First
I should be writing this post in my Blogspot blog but according to my stats, less people reads this blog compared to that blog. So I shall rant here.
I was driving to hubby’s shop to send him his dinner yesterday evening. Even before I started driving, I made a plan to hop over to Giant with baby after hubby has done taking his dinner and bathing. I wanted to buy chicken thigh so that I can bake chicken again since my children loves it so much and I wanted to give some to my mom’s coz on that day, I told her I will give her some but ended up none at all coz after we dig in, all left was the breast part and my mom does not like that part.
As I was sitting at the counter, waiting for hubby to finish bathing I decided not to go and spend. This is because I am not getting enough income from online to pay my bills at the end of the month. This sucks! 
Even though I know I can’t go to work now, I kept hoping that I can. Everyday when I drive my girls to kindy, I passes a few factories and I kept wondering whether there is any vacancy for me there. I miss earning for myself and for my family.
If you are wondering where is my husband; he is still around but I cannot depend on him. He wants to do what he likes even if it means not earning enough to support the family. I know he is praying and trying very hard to earn more but after 3 years, business is not doing any better. If I were him, I will go back to his previous, previous profession even though I dreaded it but I know I can get fix income every month for my family. To me, it is family first and my wants come later. But he is not me and I will not force him to do what he does not like.
Maybe this is one of the reasons as to why I want my baby to grow up faster. So that I can send him to a babysitter and go back to work. *sigh*
I better go back to sleep now. It is 5am already and I need to wake up at 7.30am to breastfeed and get my girls ready for kindy.